Someone told me this morning that his wife sleep-trains each of their children at around four or five months old.

I told him, “It’s unbelievable—but I don’t know if I could do it. How do you listen to your own baby cry and not pick them up?”

His answer struck me.

“You’re looking at it like you’re doing this so you can sleep better. You’re not. You’re doing it for the child. The child needs sleep. The child wants to sleep. They simply haven’t learned how yet.

So yes, for a few nights, it may feel painful. But you’re not ignoring their pain—you’re helping them learn something they need for their own good.”

And then he said something remarkable:

Maybe that’s how we need to look at what the Ribono Shel Olam sometimes puts us through.

When something hurts, we naturally ask: Why is Hashem doing this to me?

But Hashem needs nothing from us. Whatever He does is for us.

Sometimes the very nisayon that feels painful is exactly what we need to grow, to become stronger, or to reach the next place in life that we could never have reached without it.

We may be crying because we don’t understand.

But our Father does.

And sometimes, what feels like the pain is actually the help.

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