There are people out there suffering in silence. Maybe others judge, but do they truly know? So many issues are addressed, but yours is off the radar. You may struggle daily with basics like home chores, work, schedules, organization, motivation, impulsivity, procrastination, relationships, davening, mood swings… the list goes on.

The problem is, you, my friend, are respected, even revered. You’re the doer in the community – you may run a school, shul, businesses, organizations, maybe even all of the above! You’re who the community counts on in tough times.

Yet you live your life with unspoken challenges, day in, day out. You’re sought after, everyone wants your help, your opinion, your money, your connections, your kind heart. If only they knew… if only they knew how hard it is to get out of bed, to deal with things before they become urgent, to live a life of normalcy, to have calm moments, to take a few minutes to decompress. Calm eludes you.

It’s hard being at the top but feeling like you’re at the bottom. It’s tough living life riding “waves” that give you a high, tackling new projects, bringing massive ideas to fruition – because waves crash, and depression sets in. How hard is it to always chase those waves and highs to keep from crashing?

Why can’t you live a 9-to-5 life for at least some days? Why can’t things slow down? Why do you have to live in a whirlwind of action, pressure, and deadlines to feel good about yourself?

And then, for some, there’s the anxiety – the ever-present anxiety that comes with it, hounding you, ringing alarm bells when there’s no smoke. Chest tight, you rack your brain, hoping to identify the source, but it never shuts down.

You were diagnosed with ADHD as a kid – don’t adults grow out of it? Why does it seem to be a major factor in your life?

It’s a lonely world to live in. People look up to you; they see a happy person leading a fulfilling life. How can they know the pain and discomfort you feel? You’re too proud to join support groups, but you desperately need someone to talk to, silently you’re screaming for help, but no one hears you.

The good news is, there is help. There are steps you can take to deal with the chaos, stabilize the whirlwind, and find comfort. There are tools to be learned that can help you.

ADHD is a double-edged sword. You can fall on it and get hurt, or learn to wield it. ADHD makes you a superman – it allows you to do so much more than anyone else. Your capacity is greater than that of everyone else; your talent and drive, unmatched.

You CAN have a better life, you can feel calm and composed, you can learn to quiet the voices and empower your condition.

I’m just like you, and I still struggle every day. I too yearn for serenity, calm, some semblance of normality. I don’t have all the answers, I wish I did… I have a ways to go. But, by learning about my challenges, and identifying the patterns, I have found some relief, you can too.

Seek out a professional who specializes in ADHD. Talk to your doctor about options. You’ll be so happy you did. Seek help. Don’t face it alone.

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