Q: Can a woman wear a custom made sheitel?

A: Let me explain something about this subject of sheitlach. I don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings; I want to make everybody happy and wearing a sheitel is certainly a good thing. But you should know that some sheitlach look too natural.

And therefore long-haired sheitlach I think should be avoided. I won’t tell you exactly what to do, but you must know there is a responsibility on women to be able to come before the Beis Din Shel Maalah when the time is up and she should be able to say that she wasn’t the cause of anybody who was looking at her too much.

A woman should never be in a position where she is liable to be blamed for causing men to look at her. It’s not her fault that she is a woman, but she has to be careful not to misuse that privilege. Her husband is the one who has to look at her; others should not look.

And therefore if you are too careful with your appearance, it’s looking for trouble. I don’t say you shouldn’t look good, but to make it your business to look attractive, that’s not right.

At home many people are slovenly, they’re sloppy. The husband sees a sloppy wife at home but on the street she dresses up to kill! It should be the opposite. At home you should dress up and make the best impression on your husband; on the street just be plain.

(Toras Avigdor – August 1998)