Is biology destiny? How much do we independently determine our choices in life? The Avner Institute presents three letters highlighting the paradox of effortlessly choosing the right school, synagogue, or neighborhood, yet encountering human challenges; and the Rebbe’s emphasis on Torah observance and the innate will to overcome deviant temptations or to correct sinful or negligent behaviors.

In loving memory of Hadassah Lebovic A”h

“Suitable for you and your family”

By the Grace of G-d
24 Tammuz 5739
Brooklyn, NY

Dr. Yonoson Yitzchok Adler
1528 East-West Highway
Silver Spring, MD 20910

Greeting and Blessing:

This is to acknowledge receipt of your letter of the 20th of Tammuz, and many thanks for the good news it contained, including the opportunity to purchase a house as you described in your letter. According to your description, the house seems suitable for you and your family, as well as being in a suitable neighborhood, especially being within walking distance of a shul.

May G-d grant that your purchase of the house should be in a happy and auspicious hour, and that the change should be a change for good and blessing.

In view of the subject matter of the letter, it is sent to you ahead of time.

With blessing,

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“To overcome the extraordinary difficulty”

By the Grace of G-d
25 Shevat 5746
Brooklyn, NY

Greeting and Blessing:

This is to acknowledge receipt of your letter of Jan. 26th, in which you write about a serious problem.

As requested, I will remember you in prayer for the fulfillment of your heart’s desires for good.

While all blessings come from Hashem, a Jew is expected to do what is necessary in the natural order. In the matter of the said problem, you surely know that there are doctors and psychiatrists who treat it and have been successful in many cases. I know of a number of cases of people who had this problem but eventually overcame it, married, and raised a family.

Clearing Misconceptions

While on this topic, I would like to clear up a misconception that has led some individuals into confusion and wrong conclusions. The misconception stems from the argument that since some individuals are born with this problem, it must be a “natural” thing; hence it cannot be designated as a wrong, or a sin, and there is therefore no need to do anything to change it or, at any rate, it is not a serious problem at all.

That this approach is entirely without foundation can be seen from the fact that the Torah (called Toras Chaim and Toras Emes because it is our true guide in the everyday life) declares that to indulge in it, or even to dwell on it mentally, is a grave transgression of Hashem’s commandment. Hence, it is also clear that the problem is controllable, for if it were beyond human control, Hashem would not have made it a sin.

The fact that the problem may largely be congenital does not alter the situation. Every day children are born with particular natures and innate tendencies or drives, some of them good and some of them bad. This is why human beings have to be trained and educated, so as to develop and strengthen the positive characteristics and eliminate the bad ones. The Creator endowed human beings with the capacity to improve, indeed, even to change, their “natural” (i.e. innate) traits.

Inborn Trait?

A case in point is kleptomania. It is generally recognized that kleptomania is a very compulsive drive. But no one will suggest that because it is probably inborn and extremely difficult to resist, the kleptomaniac should be told that it is okay for him to steal, or that there is nothing he can, or should, do about it, and so on.

Similarly, in the case of one who is born with a drive to destroy things, or with a quarrelsome or aggressive nature, or with a propensity to cheat or lie, or any other innate trait that is considered reprehensible. No normal society would declare that since one was born that way, one should be allowed to go through life according to one’s natural desires and tendencies. Such an attitude will help neither the individual nor the society. On the contrary, everything should be, and is, done to help individuals overcome their neurological problems, whatever they may be.

Needless to say, the person who is afflicted with this or other neurological problems may well ask, “Why has Hashem created such a compulsive drive, which is in direct contradiction to His moral Code? Why has He afflicted me, who desires to comply fully with His commandments?”

No human being can answer such questions, which only Hashem, the Creator, can answer. One observation that can be suggested in relation to the question, “Why me?”—if an individual experiences a particularly difficult, or trying, situation, it may be assumed that Hashem has given him extraordinary powers to overcome the extraordinary difficulty. The individual concerned is probably unaware of his real inner strength; the trial may therefore be designed for the sole purpose of bringing out in the individual his hidden strength, which, after overcoming his problem, can be added henceforth to the arsenal of his revealed capacities, in order to utilize both for infinitely greater achievements for the benefit of himself, and others.

Maimonides, the “Guide of the Perplexed” of his generation and of all subsequent generations, who was also acclaimed as the greatest physician of his time, declares in a well known passage in his famous Code, MishnehTorah (Yad Hachazaka): “Every person has the option (power), if he so desires, to direct himself to do only good and be a Tzaddik, or, if he chooses, to follow the bad road and be a Rasha [evil person]. Do not ever think that a person is predestined from birth to be a Tzaddik or Rasha. Nor is there any inner compulsion to make a choice, but one has the capacity to choose the right behavior, and it is entirely a matter of one’s own will and determination” (Free translation from Hil. Teshuva, ch. 5. See it there at length).

Considerable Progress

A final remark from the scientific viewpoint.

To say that the human mind and neural system are unimaginably intricate is to say the obvious. Only the Creator knows His handiwork. But the Creator has endowed the human mind with wonderful qualities to probe the mysteries of nature, to research and experiment and steadily gain more knowledge about himself and his physical and mental capacities.

Considerable progress has been made by scientists in their studies of the brain cells and hormones. It is now clear that a wide range of human emotions and sensations can be stimulated artificially with the aid of electronic and biochemical techniques. It is not generally agreed that most, if not all, neurological disorders, including deviant sexual behavior, probably proceed from chemical (hormonal) deficiencies or irregularities during the period of youth. Some neurological disorders are already being treated successfully in certain areas involving the neural system, and it is to be hoped that the range will expand and eventually include the whole spectrum of neurological disorders, both of individuals and of nations.

In the meantime, we can only put our trust in Hashem, and strengthen our adherence to the Torah and mitzvoth, of which it is written, “They are our life and the length of our days.”

With blessing,

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By the Grace of G-d
11 Tishrei 5749
Brooklyn, NY

Greeting and Blessing:

It was a pleasure to meet with you and our other distinguished friends on the day before Erev Yom Kippur.

A personal meeting between Jews should always be a good, pleasurable, and productive event. When it coincides with the other two auspicious dimensions, namely, time and place—it is certain to have all three elements: goodness and sweetness to themselves, and usefulness to other fellow Jews, in the fullest measure.

To focus on the dimension of time—what could be a more auspicious time than the period between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, at the beginning of an especially auspicious year, an ibbur year [Jewish Leap Year), a year that has thirteen months.

The essential aspects of our Jewish Leap Year have been discussed on various occasions. One point, which cannot be overemphasized, is particularly relevant at this time of year. It has to do with the Torah concept of time.

Recurring Phenomenon

Normally, the lunar year (which is the basis of our luach, the Jewish calendar, lags behind the solar year by about eleven days. In order that our festivals occur in their due season (Pesach in the spring; Succoth in the autumn, etc.), the time lag is made good by the inclusion of an extra month every two or three years. This makes an ibbur year, which not only evens out the score, but surpasses the solar year by as many as eighteen, nineteen, or twenty days, as the case may be.

While the ibbur year is a recurring phenomenon involving highly intricate calculations and details that affect Jewish life in totality, it also provides a simple, abject lesson. Every Jew has been endowed with the capacity to recoup and complete those “lost” days which, for one reason or another, have not been fully utilized in terms of Yiddishkeit, Torah, and mitzvoth.

This means, in effect, that a Jew has the spiritual strength to make himself “master over time.” Indeed, he can gain mastery over time not only in terms of the present and the future, by setting for himself the highest standards of conduct, but he can also rectify his past.

New Worlds

This is why the above lesson of the ibbur year is particularly relevant in the Ten Days of Return, the Asseres Yemei Teshuva—that period of time that has been assigned for Jews to return even closer to their true essence.

The same period, inasmuch as it begins with Rosh Hashanah, marks the origin and creation of the world. It is written, “The world was built on chessed (kindness).” The Creator, the Master Builder, in His kindness, among other things, set the stage for created man to become a builder of worlds—our own world as well as “new worlds.”

We Jews have been particularly privileged to be builders, especially where our children are concerned: “Banayich, bonayich.” Banayich—“your children;” Bonayich—“your builders.” Each child, boy or girl, brought up in the way of Yiddishkeit, Torah and mitzvoth, is a binyan adei-ad, “an everlasting edifice,”—a world in his/her own right, as well as a builder of worlds.

This is why our recent meeting, during the Ten Days of Return, at the “head” of the current new ibbur year, for the purpose and cause of building new worlds, must become meaningful and vitally important.

With prayerful wishes for hatzlacha [success] in all above, and for a joyous Succoth festival, and

With esteem and blessing,

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